This is one divot of John's that Peggy didn't mind replacing. wildon
	Being a Blonde she had her pick of the tools. wildon
	Peggy is in fact "drop-dead gorgeous", but she's not the sharpest tool in the shed. Her blonde hair is a DEAD give-away! Mike Gray - Mikey CAN spell!
	Things were again quiet in the Brown's front yard after the commotion created when someone announced: "Elvis is now leaving the garage sale"! David Winger - Woodland Hills, CA
	When Bob's wife said "you'd look good in it" she wasn't talking about the clothes! David Winger - Woodland HIlls, CA
	"OK, lets practice loading it into that black wagon one more time; in other words, let's RE-HEARSE." jwd - Portland, OR
	Redneck wake jwd - Portland, OR
	"It has all mod cons,Plasma screen,DVD, surround sound,home cinema,PS2......oh sorry I thought you were interested in the CAR!" Helen - Yorkshire
	Peggy warned Mike about leaving the lid up. msquanna
	Someone get a rotisserie for Wildon. He's turning awful brown. msquanna
	Once again Trooper Mark finds his hopes for another successful season for Vanderbilt. wildon
	Mike couldn't stand the heat, so he got out of the coffin. msquanna
	"....and the best feature is, it's totally soundproof!" Helen - Yorkshire
	Poor bloke is dead but he just won't lie down Helen - Yorkshire
	Dennis was a young thing, but soon old age crypt up on him. wildon
	P.R. being from a smalltown in New Jersey, was always being left out. wildon
	Michael looked over Jordon and what did he see? Shaquille O'neill coming after he. wildon
	After three days, Frank began to look like the Purple Prince of Monaco. wildon
	Once again Peggy was fooled by a cheap imitation. Amazingly, only TWO things at the yard sale were drop dead gorgeous. The coffin and Peggy. msquanna - With regards to D.W. ;) wildon
	Charlie S., is no longer a Traveling Salesman. wildon
	Except fot the DEADENDS Larry enjoyed his job as Florida's top hair dresser. WILDON
	Peggy figures that a coffin would be an appropriate TOOL BOX for her husband because he never does any work! WITH THE TOOL BOX PEGGY HAS FOR JOHN, IT'S NOT WORK, IT'S PURE PLEASURE. WILDON
	Peggy was caught trying to look at Mike's thing, but according to Pony Tayl it was no big thing. wildon
	Amy enjoys another opening and another show. wildon
	Mike, please remove that thing this instant! You're creeping everyone out! Oh, I'm sorry...I thought you were wearing a mask. msquanna
	Amazingly, only TWO things at the yard sale were drop dead gorgeous. The coffin and Peggy. msquanna - With regards to D.W. ;)
	Less mistakes this year means local doctor can sell excess inventory. Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	I don't mind people selling a coffin at a Garage Sale but they could at least have the decency of first removing the contents! Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	Wildon sold his coffin after his wife tried and failed to kill him. She did not use a WOODEN STAKE. Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	Peggy figures that a coffin would be an appropriate TOOL BOX for her husband because he never does any work! Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	Even Peggy dropped by for a free fill. wildon
	Larry was feeling Fine, so Moe shot him. wildon
	And Coyote Killer was delighted to find that it has all the creature comforts of home. wildon
	I'm buying it as a gift for my Mother-In-Law. You COULD say it's my hope chest. Dennis Silver - Asheville, NC
	Neighbors that looked in on Bob thought he was looking a tad bit pale and was losing a lot of weight! David Winger - Woodland Hills, CA
	Even Mike's dates from the cemetary were bored stiff. msquanna
	The casket was too "roomy" to store Mike's MANY MUB wins. A thimble proved to be a more "suitable" choice. msquanna
	You might be a redneck if....your funeral arrangements include a garage sale. Dennis Silver - Asheville, NC
	This coffin is perfect for Peggy's dead captions. Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	Cannibal Mike couldn't wait to step out and press the flesh with his customers. msquanna
	Nothing seemed "eerie" at the William's yard sale...that is, until Wildon appeared. Then, there were screams of terror! msquanna
	"I used to be a door-to-door salesman," said hunchback Gray who now stood 4'3". msquanna
	COUNT GRAYCULA had a lot at STAKE on his yard sale. He constantly complained he wasn't getting any BITES. msquanna
	Miss Vicki, never did like TIPTOEING THRU THE TULIPS. wildon
	Charlie S., was expecting at least FOUR ROSES, But instead the old buzzard got WILD TURKEY. wildon
	KATHY LEARNING, REMAINS TO BE SEEN. wildon
	The last bed you'll ever need. Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	Zombies have garage sale for stuff no longer needed. Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	Wildon's made his bed, now I wish he'd lay in it. Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	Can you dig it? Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	After getting new digs, Dracula sells his old haunts to the highest bidder. Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	Wildon's wife decides at the last minute that cremation is better (and great for covering up the evidence). Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	Autopsy not included. Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	Alternate ending to Death of a Salesman...what to do when the guy doesn't die. Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	Garage sale features undergournd parking capabilities. Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	For those shop til you drop type ladies. Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	Some garage sales offer more buried treasures than others. Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	Wildon's wife decides to sell his coffin and just go with a cardboard box when the time comes (and she's hoping it's soon). Charlie S. - Centennial, CO
	I don't know what I'm gonna do with that, but throw in the gas grill, the Homer Simpson lava lamp, and the neon Corona bar sign and you got yourself a deal! Clem - Arkinsaw
	"Coming up next on the news at ten, guess what business has jumped on the time-share bandwagon!" Pia Doublestream - Yellow River
	88 Bottles of Beer on the Wall. wildon
	Some beds just weren't made for claustrophobics! David Winger - Woodland Hills, CA
	Poor Wildon, We tried to warn him about posting mean things about Helen; on the Message Board. ..
	Won't you join Coyote Killer, in a Scavenger Hunt? wildon
	Peggy needn't worry about Count Dracula, she eats Garlic Bread. wildon
	Knuckles just hates it when Ted Turner colorizes Old Time Movies. wildon
	The Good News They struck oil on Frank's Property, too bad it was on the Family Plot. wildon
	Mike liked to take Peggy along with him on his Treasure Haunts. wildon
	Knock, Knock, Jokes were very inappropriate. wildon
	At Last Larry has found a job that lets him start at the top. wildon
	Amazingly, only one thing at the yard sale was drop dead gorgeous! David Winger - Woodland Hills, CA
	What you would expect on a dead end street! David Winger - Woodland HIlls, CA
	Peggy bought this coffin because it's large enough to store a month's supply of her cigarettes, whiskey, and her favorite S&M utensils. Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	Dracula's daytime yardsale was his undoing. Mariann - Wetumpka, AL
	"...and at a bare bones price, too!" Mariann - Wetumpka, AL
	The perfect bed for the guest bedroom...my mother-in-law won't ever visit again! Mariann - Wetumpka, AL
	Finally, something that will drown out his snoring. Mariann - Wetumpka, AL
	Go to enough garage sales and sooner or later you'll find that special planter for grandma! David Winger - Woodland HIlls, CA
	"Hey, I'm selling it cheap 'cause it's only been used one time." Mariann - Wetumpka, AL
	Peggy kept whining to her husband that their bed is very uncomfortable, so he bought something that will allow her to rest in peace. Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	Mike shows up in his hearse. (When it absolutely, positively has to be there overnight.) msquanna
	What do you want on your Tombstone? Paula Radzovich - Weymouth Ma.
	"Nice yard sale, Bill! By the way, I'm glad to see you and your wife's mother are finally getting along!" Frank Monaco - Coconut Creek FL
	While shopping for lawn furniture, Wildon completes the set by picking up this comfy chaise lounge. msquanna
	"No thanks! Although I COULD use the headstone as an outdoor umbrella stand." Frank Monaco - Coconut Creek FL
	Old man Gray tried to pass off the claw marks as being made by his cat, who used the casket as a scratching post. msquanna - Puhleeeeeze! ;)
	Mike's poor eyesight leads him to believe he had just bought a tanning bed. msquanna
	"Recent weight loss forces sale" Helen - Yorkshire
	After faking his wife's death and collecting on the insurance policy, Wildon proudly shares the wealth with neighbors. msquanna
	Mom always said all this crap was going to bury her someday. Amy - Glen Ellyn, IL
	When Stella asked about having a garage sale, her husband snapped: "Over my dead body!" Amy - Glen Ellyn, IL
	Deceased sold separately. Amy - Glen Ellyn, IL
	Mike prominently displays what can happen to "hagglers." msquanna
	It was impossible to reschedule the garage sale, so they went ahead with the wake. (And as it turned out, had a few good offers for Uncle Ned.) Amy - Glen Ellyn, IL
	For sale: Convertible coffin for the fresh-air lover. P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	Family plots to scam neighbors. P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	Guaranteed non-narcotic cure for insomnia! P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	Peggy makes lots of money by digging up graves and selling the coffins. I won't mention what she does with the corpse! Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	The mystery was solved, when it turned out that PR-Smalltown USA and Phil Ryder, were one and the same. wildon
	Charlie had to be buried in two separate coffins, due to the size of his large S. wildon
	Mike never had any trouble digging up a date, as long as Amy was back home before Midnight. wildon
	P.R. and Casper the Ghost broke up...When He tried to get to Friendly. wildon
	Peggy's Sand Witch Shoppe, is Under New Management, and on Top of Aulde. wildon
	An open-and-shut case. P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	Casket for sale: For deep-thinking people. P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	Keep one on hand for that unexpected overnight visitor! P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	This coffin, when prominently displayed in the home, guaranteed to shorten your mother-in-law's visit. P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	For sale: Casket with a free pack of cigarettes for coffin nails. P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	Buy it while you're still on the right side of the grass! P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	For sale: Coffin lined with spandex. One size fits all. P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	Wishing your neighbors a good mourning! P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	For sale: Antique coffin, imported from Transylvania. P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	Ladies: Put your husband in this coffin and he will never snore again! P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	Guaranteed: No backaches after a night in our dial-a-number coffin! P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	A tisket, a tasket, I found somebody's casket! P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	Digging up the dirt about the neighbors. P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	We pride ourselves on our open-door policy! P.R. - Smalltown, USA
	"My wife never got around to using it," said Mike. "But, she had planned to keep the family jewels in there." msquanna
	Wildon picks up a little something for his narcolepsy. msquanna
	I've been DIEING to buy one of those. Dennis Silver - Asheville, NC
	Mike escorts Peggy to her quarters for the evening. msquanna
	The lowly priced urns were flying off the shelves. msquanna
	Mike tried to profit when he found out his home was built on burial grounds. msquanna
	Being from a small town J.R. relished showing off her latest poker winnings...Mike felt the poker strike his head. wildon
	JWD will throw in two pounds of Portland Cement with each odor. wildon
	Dennis became extremely fearful when he found out that this coffin was lined with silver. wildon
	Despite Parking in a Handi-capped Zone, John finallly got a hole in one... after all Peggy is a good shot. wildon
	Peggy bought this for her bathroom, but she couldn't figure out how to attach the faucets and drain pipe. Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	Helen knew that it was time to break up with her boyfriend Larry, when he started bringing his work home. wildon
	Wildon became extremely fearful when he found out that this coffin was lined with silver. Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	For Sale: 50 Cents (used only a few times) Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	This is just what Peggy needed to get rid of the horrible smell in her basement. Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	Wildon was impressed by the easy-open lid. He will be able to fly out during a full-moon in search of tasty victims. Mike Gray - Amery, WI
	Mike knows that the best BIER comes from Milwaukee. wildon
	Larry quit his job as a mortician, because it turned out to be a dead end job. wildon
	CK decides An occasion like this calls for a stiff drink...so Mary gave everyone some Gallow Wine. wildon
	Coffin' up some money to help your neighbor. Coyote Killer - Mojave, Ca
	Jack Lalanes' yard sale. Coyote Killer - Mojave, Ca
	At least now Peggy won't have to dust under the bed. wildon
	It wasn't always easy living next door to the Addams Family. wildon
	Getting stiffed in the neighborhood. Coyote Killer - Mojave, Ca
	Larry decided to become a Mortician, because he liked to work with people. wildon
	Removing the skeletons from your closet. Coyote Killer - Mojave, Ca
	The rising cost of a good funeral. Coyote Killer - Mojave, Ca
	Repossessed coffins for sale, previous owner failed to make payments. Larry Fishbach - Aurora, OH
	Killing two birds with one stone. Coyote Killer - Mojave, Ca
	Comes with free fill dirt, aha! Peggy the plot thickens. wildon
	Yes Mike, it comes with Air-Conditioning. wildon
	This Space for Rent...Until the Day of the Rapture. wildon

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